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How to save the airlines - Printable Version

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- dmano - 07-03-2008

HOW TO SAVE THE AIRLINES:


Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place. 


Replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers! 


What the hell -- They don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss? 


 The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a 'party
atmosphere' going in the cabin.

Of course every businessman in the country would start flying again, hoping to see
 naked women. 
 
Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back  20% of the tips, including lap dances and 'special services.' 

 The Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women..

Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues. 
 
This is definitely a win- win situation if we handle it right -- a  golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.


Why didn't Bush think of this?

Why do I still have to do everything.



- Wellardmac - 07-03-2008

LOL! I love it! Funny. Big Grin


- George3 - 07-03-2008

In typical fashion.


- Darren - 07-03-2008

Dave, seriously, are you going to start campaigning for circle tracks in the DE schedule?


- AMoore - 07-09-2008

dmano wrote:
Quote:HOW TO SAVE THE AIRLINES:


Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place.


Replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers!


What the hell -- They don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss?


The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a 'party
atmosphere' going in the cabin.

Of course every businessman in the country would start flying again, hoping to see
naked women.

Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and 'special services.'

The Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women..

Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues.

This is definitely a win- win situation if we handle it right -- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.


Why didn't Bush think of this?

Why do I still have to do everything.

Dave,

I think this is the first time we have ever agreed on anything!Big Grin



- AMoore - 07-09-2008

Has anyone else noticed that expected flight times have increasedd by like 25%.  I believe airlines are doing this to improve their on time numbers. 



- ccm911 - 07-09-2008

How can anyone fly anymore?  It seems that we are going backwards at a very fast rate.  If I am not mistaken, a flight to Los Angeles now takes longer than it did back in the sixties.

Well, just another excuse to take the money saved from not flying, and using it to buy a faster ride.  If I had the money......



- dmano - 07-09-2008

AMoore wrote:
Quote:dmano wrote:
Quote:HOW TO SAVE THE AIRLINES:


Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place.


Replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers!


What the hell -- They don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss?


The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a 'party
atmosphere' going in the cabin.

Of course every businessman in the country would start flying again, hoping to see
naked women.

Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and 'special services.'

The Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women..

Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues.

This is definitely a win- win situation if we handle it right -- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.


Why didn't Bush think of this?

Why do I still have to do everything.

Dave,

I think this is the first time we have ever agreed on anything!Big Grin

Here is where you are wrong.

I have an Orange Crate to go with your Pea.

We should bring them to the track some day and go profile'in



- AMoore - 07-09-2008

Quote:Here is where you are wrong.

I have an Orange Crate to go with your Pea.

We should bring them to the track some day and go profile'in
I don't know why I would be wrong for agreeing with you on the flight attendant issue, but I would love to see your Orange Crate.  I used to show my Pea Picker with my 1968 Firebird convertible which was the same color, (called Vedoro Green by Pontiac).  My first Crate experience was on a friend's Orange Crate in 1974.  All of the Crates were amazing for their day, but really heavy.  Is your's original or restored.  My Pea Picker is all original except for the back slick and cables.  It is in excellent condition.  Have you checked the prices for these on e-bay?


- dmano - 07-09-2008

All original, I was able to find some NOS front and rear tires and even the original handle bar streamers at fall Hershey 2 years ago . The bike looks almost new. 9.8 out of 10.